Thomas+Biography+Assessment

**__ LEVEL 4 BIOGRAPHY INDIVIDUAL FEEDBACK & ASSESSMENT. __**  1. ** Choose someone to write about. ** You could write about an author, a movie star, a war hero, a member of the community, an athlete or even a family member. Someone who has displayed some form of courage either personally, or for someone or something else. Sir Edmund Hilary was a wonderful choice Thomas. I thoroughly enjoyed learning about someone I didn't know a lot about.  2. ** Find out as much as you can about the person you’ve chosen. ** Read newspaper reports, do a Google Search, read encyclopedia articles and books. Conduct interviews if the person is someone you know. Use two or more sources to gather facts to cross-reference your information. Can you contact this person or their Association? You definitely used more than 2 sources to gather your information. Make sure you don't limit yourself to just online searches. There can be amazing information found in books, magazines and encyclopedias. Your information was detailed.  3. ** Write a title. ** The title could include the name of the person you’re writing about. You could write it in a way that is creative. A catchy slogan/headline for example. Thomas your title was very colourful and eye-catching. I will show you several websites where you can embed headings that have motion and can be even more eye-catching!   4. ** Write an introduction ** that grabs the reader’s attention that clearly states who you’re writing about. Your introduction was brief but to the point. I encourage you to work on including as much detail as possible. Sir Edmund is a famous man and would have lots of information about his life and journeys.   5. ** Write interesting paragraphs that include information about the person’s childhood. ** Birthplace and the area where he or she grew up? Family? Schooling? Who did he or she look up to? What has this person achieved? Thomas you must have missed this section of the rubric because you only mentioned his date of birth. You must make sure you cover all the criteria in order to gain full marks.  6. ** Write interesting paragraphs that include information about the courage this person has shown. THIS IS YOUR MAIN FOCUS. ** What has this person faced and how have they overcome it? How have they managed this before during or after? How can you qualify HOW they have shown courage? This was a crucial part of this task. You cleverly had a section that was dedicated to answering this question but unfortunately it lacked depth. Remember to read the questions on the rubric and then if you answer them - you have a great chance of gaining full marks!  7. ** Write a conclusion ** that includes your opinion about why it is important to learn about this person. What can we learn from the courage this person has shown? How can the example of this person’s courage help us to achieve our own dreams or take a look at ourselves? Can you relate to this person? If so, how Thomas agin the detail was missing form your conclusion. Make sure you always double check the rubric to ensure you have covered all of the areas. This is an important part of any project task as it gives you the opportunity to sum up what YOU believe Sir Edmund did by showing courage.

**Biography Assessment: Courage** Name: Thomas Grejsen Submitted on time: YES / no Score: 18/28 - Good effort Thomas :)
 * **CRITERION** || **3.25** || **3.50** || **3.75** || **4.0 +** ||
 * **Research** || Research restricted to one site. Some text changed into own words with understanding. || 2 research sites used. Able to write text into own words to show understanding. || 2 or more research sites used and cross-referenced. Able to write text into own words to show a deep understanding. || 2 or more research sites used and cross-referenced. Able to write text into own words to show a deep understanding with the ability to justify (explain) further. ||
 * **Introduction** || Includes the person’s name within a short paragraph. || Includes the person’s name within a paragraph using interesting vocabulary. || Includes the person’s name within a paragraph using interesting vocabulary designed to capture the reader’s interest. || Includes the person’s name within a paragraph using interesting vocabulary designed to intrigue the reader further. ||
 * **Content** || 2 – 3 paragraphs of factual information. || 2 – 3 paragraphs of factual information, also includes some personal stories. || 3+ paragraphs of factual information, also includes personal stories relative to the act of courage. || 3+ paragraphs of factual information, personal stories relative to the act of courage, including the impact before, during and after. Includes own opinion. ||
 * **Conclusion** || Conclusion includes similar information to the introduction || Conclusion sums up the content of the subject. || Conclusion sums up the content of the subject with information regarding the ongoing journey of the subject. || Conclusion sums up the content of the subject with information regarding the ongoing journey of the subject, including a relevant statement or quote. ||
 * **Bibliography** || Bibliography does not include all sources & is not in alphabetical order. || Bibliography includes most sources & shows some organisation. || Bibliography includes all sources & shows organisation. || Bibliography includes all sources, is in alphabetical order & includes Title, date, date researched, pp #, publication details. ||
 * **Presentation**

EXCELLENT || Information mostly completed. || Information mostly completed with more detailed answers. || Information mostly completed with detailed answers & includes photos, media articles or diagrams. || Completed with detailed answers & includes photos, media articles or diagrams with extra information. || Live interview (taped or in person). Transcribed/audio interviews. Research beyond conventional means (National Archives). ||
 * **Organisation** || Some planning, drafting, proof reading, editing and revising shown. Kept work in order, asked questions to keep on track || Planning, drafting, proof reading, editing and revising shown by using a model of other’s writing or a tool such as a mind map. Monitored and checked progress. Organised and persistent. || Updated planning, drafting, proof reading, editing and revising shown. Use of peers, teachers and adults as learning resources. Checking goals. Seeks support where necessary. || Updated & improved planning, drafting, proof reading, editing and revising shown. Study routines & self-management of tasks shown through following instructions for learning goals. ||
 * **Going Further** ||  ||   ||   || Emailing or writing to the subject.